new day..?

few mOnths agO...i thOught i have started a new day...with new visiOns..new attitude..new perspective.. i just thOught...that didnt happen the way i want it tO be.. i'm still the same.. i dOnt want tO be the same..i want tO get rid Of all the bad things in my mind,my head and my heart! i prayed a lOt..i knOw Allah S.W.T will hear me sOoner Or later..i want tO change! fOr the better!

but i realized i cant dO that On my Own..i need at a hand..tO hOld On tO me whenever i lOst my grip...still cOuldnt find One thOugh..dOing this all alOne is very hard..very hard...Owhh nO Allah please help me gOing thrOugh all this...i never wanna die withOut ur fOrgiveness... this time.. i really really wanna dO it right..! if Only all my friends wOuld have guts enOugh tO at least tell me what have i dOne wrOng...what shOuld i dO tO fix things up..urghhhhhhh im sO messed up!